music

So, we're almost two weeks in.  My wife had a little bleeding on what would be day 20 of her cycle.  My mind immediately went to a drastic place, but in reality I'm pretty sure it would be far too early for that sort of thing to be happening- I'll leave it unsaid.  So it was either a reaction to the fact that we're having sex far more often (sometimes three days in a row- ee!) or more than likely one of those 'post pill system re-adjusting' things.  It was only for a day or so, so not a thing to worry about.  We don't really know how long it takes for a womans body to re-adjust after coming off the pill, but as some people get pregnant the first month, and for some people it doesn't happen for over a year- I think we'll probably wait at least a couple of months before we go to the doctors for check ups.
I read somewhere online that it's a good idea to go for a fertility test straight away, but well, I feel we should just try for at least a couple months before doing that sort of thing, and with the wife's system settling down hopefully by then, there'll be a few things to ask the doctor about in 2 or 3 months as opposed to now where any conceivable problem is all in the mind.

I'm getting a bit ahead of myself in my mind, I suppose everyone does it- once you've decided to try for a baby, you sort of start thinking about 'having' one, and one of the first thoughts I had (a thought I haven't been able to shake) is that- 'oo- I better get my music collection sorted'

I know it's a little morbid, but I have a kindov picture in my head where- I'm dead,  and my kid is scouring my record collection and putting stuff on and thinking 'wow, i've never heard this before, it's brilliant- i didn't know my dad had such good taste in music'
I havent really been into music for many years although when I was into it, i was into it in a BIG way.  I was pretty renowned at uni for having an eclectic taste and listening to bands no-one else had heard of.  I started off with CD's, I had a massive collection, but when I decided to travel Europe with my girlfriend (who is now my wife) I sold my entire collection on Ebay to pay for the trip. After that, my close bond with music was pretty broken.  During the period when I was saving for the trip, I got a minidisk recorder and I used to go to the library to rent 20 cd's at a time and then I'd copy them to minidisk.  I ended up with hundreds more Minidisks that I ever had CD's.  The great thing about getting disks from the library was that I would take bands I'd never heard of before because it was included in my membership, so it didn't cost me anything more to give everything and anything a go (this is how I discovered 'Everlast' and 'Hed(pe)' amongt others... hundreds of others.)

So getting back from the trip I had no CD's and a full collection of copies so I kinda stopped searching out new music. No real reason other than my heart wasn't in it any more.  Those minidisks lasted me years until I discovered illegal online downloading and soon my MASSIVE minidisk collection was eclipsed again.  If I discovered a new band, I'd download their entire back catalogue.  This was ok for new bands with only a couple of albums, but when I discovered people like Van morrison... well, I basically ended up downloading more than I could even listen to, so again I lost interest. And to top it off, my hardrive died one day and I lost everything so I was back to my minidisk collection, that I'd kinda moved on from (in the same way I moved on from CD's.)

So when I got a new hard drive, I tried downloading the albums again, but could really only remember a small part of it, so I did it half heartedly and very piecemeal, and kinda just stopped. And since then i've mainly listened to talk radio, and most recently podcasts. I'm addicted to podcasts.  but also recently, the next music thing has happened: Spotify.  Access to every album ever made (pretty much) with no need to actually own the songs at all, legally OR illegally.

So where am I now, well the mental image of my kids looking at my record collection now consists of the shitty CD's I couldn't sell from 7 years ago, no minidisks, because I threw them all out when I discovered spotify, and random collection of mp3's on my desktop that are completely random and not even my favourites, just what I could remember from before I lost my harddrive.

I have NO music collection. And now with Spotify, I don't even need one.  But I want my kids to know the music I liked.  So this is what's on my mind.  How to sort a record collection that my kids can look at.  What do I do? - just create an Excel spreadsheet with a big list?  Maybe I should make a ton of Spotify playlists, but then what if spotify doesnt exist in the future?

your suggestions, most welcome.

obsessed

Making a baby should be a pretty straighforward thing really.  All you need is yourself and your woman, maybe a little bit of Barry White, and off you go. Do it. literally.

The thing is, having decided to go for a baby, I'm finding myself a little obsessed with researching the subject, conception, and probably less so involved in the actual conceiving action, if you know what I mean.  My wife's period ended 9 days ago. I know this because she has started a diary to keep track of these things now that she's off the pill.  You see, never having been off the pill since she started over a decade ago, apparently her system needs to adjust and she needs to keep track to see how regular her natural system is. Anyway, in those 9 days we've only had Barry on thrice.  Days 4, 5 and 6.

I realise we should be having sex more than that, but I've discovered, due to my obsessive researching that it's not as simple as that.  At this point I should like to point out that I have actually been ill with Man-flu for the past three days, which is the main reason for my lack of libedo, but my studious research has revealed to me the following:

-It's extremely unlikely that we will fall pregnant this month as it's the first month my wife has came off her pill.
-Regardless of that, apparently it's not likely a woman will fall pregnant until between the 13th and 16th day of her menstrual cycle,  so we're probably too early at this point anyway.  Thats not a hard fact or anything, but it seems, as a rule, thats when ovulation occurs and hence is the time when chances of conceiving are highest
-To increase chances, we shouldn't have sex every day.  Every other, or even every 3 days results in more potent ejaculations with higher sperm counts.  Apparently doing it more than once a day leaves you just firing out weak-ass penis soldiers.

(first and last time I ever use that expression.)

I didn't know any of this stuff, and surprisingly neither did my wife.  She didn't even know if day 1 of her cycle was the day her period started or the day it stopped. I know I used the think that a period was just a one squirt and your done sort of deal, but then I'm a dude so my ignorance is excusable.  Having said that, I don't really know anything about my system either but then I don't spend 5 days a month bleeding out my ass.

Oh, and here's how I am doing my research:  I've changed my Stumbleupon button 'interests' to Babies, Kids, Family, Married Life, Pregnancy, Giving Birth, Parenting and Relationships.

stumble. stumble. stumble. 

lets make a baby

4 days ago I officially began trying to become a father.

I'm writing this solely for myself, maybe with the thought in the back of my mind that my kids will read this one day and really get an insight into their dad before he was their dad, but from the point in his life where his kids, as yet unborn and unconceived, became his main focus.

Somehow I've ended up talking about my self in the third person.

I don't have much information about my folks before I was in the world, I don't know how many people generally look at their parents as having been just 'a couple' at one stage in their lives.  I've done the thing where I've seen a box of old photographs, as most people have done I imagine.  Mostly though, my mum and dad are just my mum and dad.  I've always had the feeling that I'd like my kids to know that mum and dad aren't just mum and dad, they are people too, people who had a life together before there were children.  For years now, when we are on holiday or just generally going around taking photo's i've had a little thing in the back back back of my mind when I'm taking the photograph of me and my wife, and the thought flits in to my head 'I cant wait for my kids to see this photograph one day.'

I want them to see that mum and dad were a loving couple once, (as I'm sure we still are_ in the future as I'm writing this I'm talking about) but well, not much of what I mean there is going to come from this blog. All of that stuff is going to come from OUR 'old photo box'  though I think our photo box is pretty big.  we've taken thousands of pictures over the years, mostly of holidays together (we LOVE to get around) so I'm sure theres enough to see us grow together PRE-CHILDREN over the last 8 years.  We've been together over 8 years now, married now almost 18 months.  This blog I guess, for me, is to acknowledge the end of the 'couple' period of our lives and to record our attempts to move on the next stage- starting our own family.

Now, I don't need to mention what that physically involves....  ok, I do- sex.  But this record isn't intended to be overly explicit, least not as I mentioned that in the back of my mind I'm aware /hoping (?) that my kids will read this one day. But I'm sure I'll end up talking about that stuff as not every entry here is going to be my meandering thoughts on fatherhood in general, but also the day to day thoughts and feeling I'm having as we're going through what we are going through- trying to make a baby.

I might talk more in another post about our lives pre-trying for a baby,  but that whole subject should be a blog of its own, or a diary I should have kept. But for now, I'm going to stick a pin in that and get onto what this blog is about:

LET'S MAKE A BABY!